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May 23, 2012, 06:10:00 AM
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Author Topic: Ad on craigs list  (Read 666 times)

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Offline LimitedWRX

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Ad on craigs list
« on: October 24, 2008, 12:14:12 PM »
 I was forwarded the following:


Want it from behind while you play Super Mario Brothers ? - m4w



Date: 2008-07-02, 2:35PM EDT



Do you love to play Super Mario Brothers on the Classic Nintendo System? Do you like to get tagged from behind while you do it? This is the post for you then.


You must know your way around the game before we meet, must be open to anal sex, also able to fake an orgasm is a plus.


I will send you the address to a hotel and a room number. When you arrive the door will be open. Please come in close and lock the door and close the shades if they are still open. I will be in the bathroom and the door will be closed. Turn on the TV and the Nintendo. Remove all of your clothing. Turn off all lights in the room and kneel down on the bed so you are directly in the light of the TV. You need to be facing the TV with your butt in the air pointed toward the pillows on the bed.


Press the start button on the controller when you are ready. I will hear the sound and turn the light off in the bathroom and come out. You will not look directly at me, only look at the TV. When the first level starts I will begin to finger you and lick you. I will be using lots of lube as well.


When you reach the end of level one, make sure to trigger the fireworks. This is vital to the entire experience. I must hear the fireworks. When level 2 begins and Mario walks into the pipe, I will penetrate you. You may say things like, "MORE", "HARDER", "YES", "FUCK ME", but nothing else. I will continue having sex until the level ends. DO NOT take the secret level skip. If you die I will pull out and spank you until the level restarts.


When you reach the flag you must again trigger the fireworks, and also orgasm. I will pull out. When the 1-3 starts I will penetrate your ass. You are allowed to say something like "OH GOD", "YES", OR "IT HURTS" no other conversation is allowed.


When level 1-4 starts I will alternate between holes as I see fit. You may beg me to cum inside or outside of you, depending on what you want. When boss falls and you reach the princess I will pull out and blow my load where you have convinced me I want too. You may then say something like "Thanks", "It was great", "I loved it", "Don't stop"


If I am impressed you may continue playing and I will continue to pleasure you. If I am not, I will turn the Nintendo Off and return to the bathroom. At this time you may clean your self with the towel that is beside the bed. Turn the lights on, redress yourself and leave.


I may come back out and talk to you as you dress but the conversation will most likely be short and revolve around scheduling another time to get together.



•Location: Orlando

•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 740493470



Sorry if this offends anyone, but I thought it was the funniest thing I've ever read !
« Last Edit: October 24, 2008, 12:20:01 PM by LimitedWRX »

Offline bignickbugeye

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #1 on: October 24, 2008, 12:29:41 PM »
wow   :-o  i cant believe people like that actualy exist.  was he refering to guys or girls... i think girls but i could be mistaken,  i dont wanna play mario any more.  :buck2:
Today, I tried to change my password to “my dick”. The website said it was too long.

my life is bro

Offline 9925leggy

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #2 on: October 24, 2008, 12:58:30 PM »
wow i really hope hes talking about girls. ( the part about different holes makes me think so) he just fucked up mario for me for a looooong time
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Offline zeedeveel55

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #3 on: October 24, 2008, 07:07:56 PM »
jesus....h....christ......


This sig is on a diet as per Kavik. All hail HypnoKAVIK!!!

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Offline Photofixer

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #4 on: October 24, 2008, 07:35:06 PM »
PFT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA   :2funny: :2funny:

OMFG ARE YOU SERIOUS! HAHAHAHAHAH  :2funny: :2funny:

Wow fucked in the head for sure...


Marty :buck2:
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Offline j13welder

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #5 on: October 24, 2008, 07:43:09 PM »
what he doesn't like sonic?    :2funny:    :idiot2:
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Offline BradleyGT

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #6 on: October 24, 2008, 07:45:10 PM »
thats funny to me, because i once had a pretty lengthy convo about how all the sound effects from super mario could be turned into sexual inuendo. this takes the cake though.
It's puddin time children

Offline hellboy69

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #7 on: October 24, 2008, 08:12:03 PM »
what he doesn't like sonic?    :2funny:    :idiot2:


DUDE Sonics sega..lol..... How bout Contra, excitebike, or super off road or some shit.. hejust had 2 ruin that damn good game! Now i gotta take it out of ther NES n burn it...lol
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Offline beat22

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #8 on: October 25, 2008, 08:05:25 AM »
sorry about that add i put it in orlando by mistake
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Offline deadlydave

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Re: Ad on craigs list
« Reply #9 on: October 25, 2008, 11:11:27 AM »
sorry about that add i put it in orlando by mistake

 :coolsmiley:  ORLY?  You're quite a dirty whore apparently.
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